DIFFERENT TYPES OF BOND
Attachment types can describe how we form relationships with other people. This includes relationships with family, partners or friends and if you trust them with your TonyBet login. In your life, you enter into different relationships with different people. These can be of a romantic, platonic or familial nature, for example. Some relationships last well and for a long time, but others tend not to. The theory of attachment types can explain why and how we form relationships.
But what are attachment types? The basis for the four different attachment types is attachment theory. This was developed by psychoanalyst John Bowlby in the 1950s. His theory deals with how a person’s attachment behavior develops and how it affects their relationships.
According to Bowlby, a person’s attachment type develops in infancy and early childhood. The relationship with the primary attachment figures is especially important. Bowlby also argues that this relationship forms the basis for all attachments throughout life.
Psychologist and couple’s therapist Krista Jordan tells PsychCentral that this early childhood relationship is so important because the infant’s survival depends on primary caregivers. Thus, according to relationship theory, the nature of the early relationship largely determines which attachment type you later develop.
THE 4 TYPES
Your own attachment type influences how you build relationships yourself, and also how they develop. A distinction is made between secure and insecure attachment types. There are four types in total:
- The secure attachment type
- The insecure-avoidant attachment type
- The insecure-ambivalent attachment type
- The insecure-disorganized attachment type
- The secure attachment type
According to theory, a person with secure attachment type has the ability to form healthy and long-term relationships. Secure attachment types have typically experienced the following during childhood:
reassurance from parents without subsequent punishments
A sense of security, understanding, encouragement and appreciation
parents with an awareness of their behavior and feelings
the emotional availability of parents
A secure attachment type may be characterized by different traits – for example, the ability to regulate one’s own feelings and good communication skills. In addition, secure attachment types usually have no problems trusting others.
- The insecure-avoidant attachment type
A fear of rejection may be present in a unic-unorganized attachment type.
The insecure-avoidant attachment type is characterized by an inability to form long-term relationships, relationship counselor Katarzyna Peoples told PsychCentral. In addition, people of this attachment type have trouble engaging in physical and emotional intimacy. With an insecure-avoidant attachment type, a person often has the following experiences in childhood:
The expectation placed on them to be self-reliant and to take care of themselves.
Punishment or rejection when she became dependent on the primary caregiver.
Rejection when she expressed her own needs and feelings.
People of insecure-avoidant attachment type may exhibit different characteristics. These may include a strong sense of independence and avoidance of emotional and physical intimacy. In addition, there may be a discomfort with sharing one’s feelings.
- The insecure-ambivalent attachment type
The insecure-ambivalent attachment type is characterized by fear of rejection and abandonment. In addition, as PsychCentral describes, co-dependency tendencies may be present. In a relationship context, this means that a person becomes emotionally dependent on another person.
When this is the case, the dependent person often feels they cannot go on living without the other person. This creates a great fear of losing that person. When an insecure-ambivalent attachment type is present, the following things may be the basis:
- an inconsistent upbringing that did not meet the child’s needs
- Problems of the child understanding the expectations of the parent, resulting in confusion and instability in the relationship
- Tendency of parents to vacillate between being there for the child and not being there for the child
- Tendency of the parent to blame the child for how they feel
A person with an insecure-ambivalent attachment type may exhibit high attachment and susceptibility to criticism among others. In addition, there is often a need to receive validation from others and there may also be a tendency to be jealous. People with this attachment type often also have problems being alone and low self-esteem.
- The insecure-disorganized attachment type
The insecure-disorganized attachment type is characterized by extremely inconsistent behavior as well as difficulty trusting others. The following experiences may be the basis:
- Trauma in childhood
- Neglect in childhood
- Abusive experiences
- Inconsistency of parents (seen by the child as a source of comfort and of fear at the same time)
In the insecure-disorganized attachment type, there is often a fear of rejection as well as an inability to regulate one’s own feelings.
