Even when you’ve thought over your options and decided with your partner that you both want a divorce, you have to keep in mind that it won’t be an easy process. A divorce isn’t just about submitting a document in court — it’s a lengthy process. Most attorneys will advise you to prepare for it, both financially and emotionally, before you begin.
The decision of getting a divorce is critical and can have lasting consequences. That’s why it’s important to take care of a few things before you and your partner call it quits. Knowing the process before will make the legal negotiations easier and the entire process smoother.
In this article, we look at a few things you should consider before getting a divorce.
- Be Absolutely Sure That This Is What You Both Want
A divorce is a highly emotional process. Even the person asking for a divorce will feel depressed and anxious throughout the ordeal. That’s why it’s important not to make a decision when you’re overly emotional. Make sure that you’ve made efforts for reconciliation before filing for a divorce. Once you’ve made a decision, you may not be able to go back on it. Many partners regret their rash decisions. If you want to give your marriage another chance, seek counseling before filing for a divorce.
- Consider Your Legal Options
Most people think divorces are legal battles to be fought in court. However, things have changed radically. There are simpler and more harmonious ways to solve a divorce; examples would be a divorce mediation or collaborative divorce.
In mediation, a neutral third-party mediator, someone who has been specially trained to mediate divorce cases, facilitates one-on-one negotiations between the divorcing parties and helps them reach a compromise. Collaborative divorce is a newer method that’s based on the philosophy of harmony. In this process, the attorneys of both parties work together as a team and agree to resolve the case without going to court.
Mediation and collaborative methods are great as they assist the partners in making the decisions that are suitable for them. However, cases where domestic violence is involved may require more than this and will still have to go to court. In such situations, discuss your options with your lawyer.
- Assess Your Financial Documents
Before you file for a divorce, it’s important to assess your finances. You can collect the documents for your financial account records, mortgage papers, bills, and family assets. Make copies of shared paper files, and shared online accounts and discuss it with your attorney before you serve the divorce papers. This is especially helpful because some spouses don’t react well to divorce and may make it difficult for you to access the information later.
- Think About Custody
If you have children, then custody is an important factor for you. Unless there are extreme cases of child abuse, you’re likely to share the custody of your child with your spouse. It’s also healthy for your child to have a nurturing relationship with both parents. Ideally, don’t discourage a healthy parent-child relationship. It’s best to review your schedules and come up with the desired custody schedule. This will allow the child to spend quality time with both parents.
- Prepare For The Future
Holding on to past wounds will only complicate your divorce process. Let go of hurt feelings and emotions and approach your divorce with the intention to problem solve and move on. Don’t hold on to small issues that can hold up your divorce process. It’s better to see the bigger picture and move on.
- Make The Necessary Purchases
Most jurisdictions prohibit the selling or buying of any marital asset at the beginning of your divorce case. This is done as a measure to prevent either spouse from dissipating the funds. Do this only if you have a legitimate purchase or sale to make. It’s not appropriate to drain out joined assets out of spite.
- Have A Support System
A divorce is a difficult time and can have a toll on you emotionally. Besides figuring out the paperwork for your divorces, it’s important to surround yourself with people who emotionally support you. Speaking to a therapist can also help you clear your emotions. This can help you cope better through these difficult times.
Getting a divorce is an exhausting experience. It’s emotionally draining for both the spouses. However, approaching with the willingness to resolve the conflict and move on can make things easier. Preparing in advance can also make it a smooth process. This can help you prepare yourself to be emotionally stable and take smart decisions that’ll have a lasting impact on your life.