3 Reasons To Choose Divorce Mediation Over Court Settlement

Dissolving a marriage could be a resolution caused by several factors. It could be incompatibility, physical or emotional abuse, lack of proper communication, absence of intimacy, infidelity, or financial conflicts. In some instances, couples may separate for a while to figure out their next step. However, if they can’t resolve their issues, many opt for a divorce.  

If you and your former spouse have chosen to dissolve your marriage, you might want to settle the matter in court. However, it may be a lengthy, stressful, and expensive process. For this reason, many people seek alternative ways to resolve issues in their divorce much quickly and easily.

Why Divorce Meditation May Be A Better Option 

An alternative to settling a divorce in court or divorce litigation is mediation. It means working with a trained professional to discuss and agree on child custody and support, debts, or property division. This third party doesn’t make decisions for you two. Instead, they help you and your former partner dissolve your marriage on your terms by facilitating your meetings, helping you understand the matters that must be settled, and assisting you in reaching an agreement that’s acceptable for both of you.  

Having your divorce attorney with you during mediation meetings might not be necessary. However, you could seek advice from them before or after your negotiations. Moreover, if your spouse comes with their lawyer and your mediator allows it, consider hiring an attorney, too. This way, you won’t be disadvantaged.  

That said, you must look for a well-experienced, certified, and reputable expert to sufficiently protect your interests. Also, since divorce policies may differ by state, you’ll need a reliable professional who understands the laws in your area. For instance, if you reside in New York, choose one of the best divorce attorneys in New York. If you live in other places, research online to find a reliable lawyer to work with.

There are several reasons why many couples might choose divorce mediation over litigation. Some of these are:

     1. It May Be Less Costly 

Divorce mediation may be less costly. It is because, in litigation, you might have to pay your attorney for a consultation, drafting motion papers, and court appearances. In most instances, lawyers charge you per hour of their time. If your case takes longer, it means that you’ll be paying more attorney fees, which could be expensive in the long term.  

In divorce mediation, you and your former spouse pay only one professional. Also, most mediators consider that attending negotiation sessions during work hours means that you’re losing money. Therefore, you may find that your meetings schedules are flexible. For instance, you may have sessions during evenings or weekends to save valuable time. Besides that, since you and your former spouse have more control over meet days, the process could take a shorter time, meaning you could save transport and mediation appointment costs.  

On the other hand, you might never know when your case is final with court settlements. Also, if your attorney doesn’t give you a fixed rate, you’ll continually pay them till the divorce is settled. It means that if your case drags, you might end up losing more money in the split.

     2. It Allows You More Control  

If you settle your divorce in court, the judge often has more control over the outcome. It means that they have the final say about you, your assets, and your children. Since most judges often have many caseloads, they might not look deeply into your issues. Therefore, they may decide the results of your divorce within a limited time and with insufficient information. This way, one party may be disadvantaged.  

Mediation, however, gives you and your former spouse more control over the divorce process and outcome. The mediator won’t decide anything for you, meaning you have the final say regarding asset division, your children’s custody, and other issues. It helps ensure that no one is disadvantaged and that everyone complies with the set agreement since it’s not imposed on any of you by anyone, as is the case with divorce litigation.

     3. It Could Help You Build A Good Post-Divorce Relationship 

Mediation could also help you and your former partner build an excellent post-divorce relationship. It may be so because most mediators are trained to assist you in working through your issues. By helping you do so, you could learn how to resolve problems that develop in the future. It is essential, especially if you need to co-parent. It could mean that you could solve critical matters in the future without the need for court interventions. 

However, you may use your attorneys to work through your disagreements for divorces settled in court. It often prevents you and your former spouse from uncovering and resolving matters from the root cause. Naturally, this may not help your future relationship after the divorce.  

Besides that, if your case is settled by a judge who has little time and information, they might come up with decisions that put one of you at a disadvantage. It creates more conflict between you and your former partner and could worsen your post-divorce relationship. If you have kids, co-parenting may be more complicated. The children could notice the hostility between the two of you. It could make it more challenging for your kids to adjust to your divorce. Instead, they might struggle socially or academically or become angry, emotionally sensitive, or depressed.  


Settling a divorce in court could be lengthy, expensive, and stressful. However, as you’ve learned in this article, mediation is less costly, quicker, and much easier. Besides that, it allows a splitting couple more control over the outcome of issues like child custody, debts, and asset division. Additionally, it may also help them build a better post-divorce relationship. These are some reasons why many people today may opt for mediation over court settlements.  



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